People were getting annoyed with me, ‘why are you so fucking nervous?’

I couldn’t give them an answer. It was too long. My memories were fading, only the sorrow left.

‘Does it worth?’

‘No, I don’t think so. However, I am too proud to pick another choice. This is my sin and I am paying my life for it. ’

Sometimes I feel my life has been wasted. Or itself is just a waste.

Good things did happened, but bad things never changed.

The saddest thing is not that after so many years of hard working, you might not be the extraordinary person you want to be, but realizing that you are even unable to be an ordinary person like others.

When I start to worry about future, I will comfort myself, ‘Don’t worry. You won’t live long enough to go through that.’

Although I was born in a peace time, I realized it might not last forever. I used to worry about if I could have a life I dreamed, now it makes me think there might not be a life at all.

They changed the constitution.